I waited in a queue

Not so long ago as I waited in queue

A young mother behind thought she was in a bit of a stew

For her, very innocent young son pointed to me and said

“Mummy, look that man has no hair on his head”

I laughed and turned only to see her face embarrassed and red

I knelt down still smiling and said him with delight

Do you know young man you are right

I said to mum what a beautiful innocent age

She smiled, red-faced subduing minimal rage

Standing closer to mum thinking well he has no hair mummy, what have I done

Then it was my turn to be served for which I had come

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Dementia you do not rule

Inspiration calls less frequently than it should

I would love to write every day if I could

Inspiration or mojo call it what you will

With positivity, happiness and joy  my heart does fill

Depression is no longer welcome in my life

I have so much to look forward to with my children and my wife

We make choices every day

Make sure yours is positive in every way

Dementia you may live here but you do not rule my life

You don’t believe me

Dementia
Dementia does not show external scars

You can’t see my brain is missing parts which you still have

Not all illnesses show externally

I look like you

I talk like you

You say to me “You look the same as you always have”

I am still the same I am still me

Dementia is terminal, no going back

You think I am going to dribble from the side of my mouth stare at the floor and shit my pants

OOPS, that must be dementia talking as I don’t swear

Oh, that’s right I don’t have dementia and you don’t really care

If I had cancer, would you treat me the same

OH that’s right you don’t believe me or care

Don’t let the door hit you on the arse on the way out

You tell my wife you do not believe a word I say

I only hope that you never have to go through this, that much I pray

 

 

Pain is now my friend

When pain becomes my best friend

Somewhere else I wish I could send

Too many drugs make me high

The I get slower and just sigh

I feel like I on the ceiling with pain still reeling

Drugs do not take away the pain of which I am stealing

Drugs masking pain, holding neck straight is so hard to do

You must be going through hell

You must be going through hell

Things are progressing faster than I want as I am sure you can tell

I hope I am not snappy as I have been before

You must see more than I know for sure

How you do it I do not know

Your stress and worry rarely show

I am forgetting much more everyday

I feel like this is a heavy price to pay

As my Aphasia continues to increase every day

Knowing one day speaking will be a thing of the past

I know you will cry silent tears every night

I feel myself slipping  with much fright

 How you do it I do not know

I love you for all that you do

Today was better

Today was a better day than yesterday was, I know

How do I know, I can’t remember I have little to show

I remember I enjoyed it, at least I think so

I think I laughed giving it a go

Tomorrow will be as new as today was, I hope

Far better to laugh than sit around and mope

When I wake up I will, I will, umm

I know I will jump out of bed and then, and then, umm

Where am I, why am I here, where is my wife

She is the love of my life

Dementia has not claimed my life

Dementia has not claimed my life

It may have changed my life

Daily challenges I have to meet

At least I am still on my feet

My disAbility still allows me to speak

People look at me like I am a freak

They do not know or care

That parts of my brain are failing and beyond repair

Terminal as this disease may be

The end result is never in my daily thoughts you see

I have too much to live for this day, tomorrow and the next

To help as many as I can this is my quest

Remember Me

Remember me I am the one who used to be here

I am the one who you spoke to without fear

I am the one who you listen to but do not hear what I say

Remember me I am the one you used to love now for which I pray

Why don’t you call, why don’t you talk

You avoid me when you see me when you walk

This cruel disease robbed us of love and friendship that we used to share

Back then you used to care

Remember me because I am still here

I am told that you do no longer know what say

Simply start with, hello, is what I hope and pray

Remember me please remember me

Always busy

Always busy means my brain is busy too

Fully committed to Dementia Alliance International and so is Sue

For her role as a carer grows and grows each day

As symptoms increase, that is the price I pay

I have to  keep going to stay in front of the rolling fog

If not I will become like a vegetable or a log

Helping other people living with this insidious disease

Love, kindness, consideration and compassion if you please

Support goes further than what we consider to be normal

This always should be informal

A confirmed diagnosis of dementia is required

Strive to survive

Start of another day wondering what it will bring

Will it be dementia, aphasia, my neck or the pressure in the head thing

I often read about people’s concerns and worries, thinking, are you still alive

Each day learning to live with what you have, not telling the world about how your life has taken a dive

With more money I could buy gifts and dreams that I know my wife deserves

Still, I wonder what today will bring, one issue or more with no reserves

When will my neck pain overtake the pain medication

Is this life of pain just around the next corner at the next station

Start of another day wondering what it will bring

Who cares, no not I because I am alive

Each day is a new day in which I must strive